I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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