You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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