i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
