I cannot find my penis.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
is wine microwaveable?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
