Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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