"it" just moved
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
But break dance skills will only take you so far
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
