please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
