hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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