I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished�
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
i think i just lost a toe
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
