I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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