"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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