The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
