Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
