you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
