Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
