I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
