I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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