The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
