k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Randomize
