i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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