god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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