I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize