You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize