maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
