why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
