id be glad to
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
