I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
