of course. lets lasso hookers.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
