some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
my sisters under your porch take her home
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I will pee on everything he values.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
