That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
