I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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