And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
