so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
