Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
