no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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