Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
