Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I just found puke in my bra..
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Randomize
