I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
