He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
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