dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
