i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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