Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
