Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
