You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
