She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I enjoy the company of your penis
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
