how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
