Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
