Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
