Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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