That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Randomize
