Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
