Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
